Sometimes we think we know what’s best for people, even if we don’t know them personally and the person just happens to be millionaire rapper, singer and songwriter Cardi B. Sure, she’s had three number one songs on Billboard’s Top 100 and has seven Grammy nominations but you, a barista with 312 Twitter followers could definitely guide her life in the right direction! What’s a gal to do when she knows what’s best for Cardi B but can’t tell her? Here are some simple steps.
Write It Down
First, write down all of your advice in a letter Cardi B would absolutely never read because she is much more successful than you, has a kid and is literally on tour right now. Even though there is absolutely no world in which she listens to you, you should still let her know you think Offset interrupting her show was lame, and she deserves better. Wow, you are so helpful!
Focus On Someone Else
Maybe all this energy you’re putting towards “improving” Cardi B’s life can be channeled toward someone else, like your coworker Lindsay who told you last week she needs a friend right now. Or, maybe the person you should focus on is you? There’s like a slight possibility that you’re spending so much of your brain space on a superstar you will literally never talk to, but by all means harass her on Twitter to tell her you have a couple notes on how she’s raising Kulture. Very helpful!
At some point, you’re just going to have to accept the fact that Cardi will never hear your incredible advice. It sucks, and you’re right in thinking she won’t be okay if she doesn’t hear what you have to say about her feud with Nicki Minaj. Once you accept she can’t hear you, you can hopefully find a little peace before continuing to respond to her tweets until the day you die! You guys are basically best friends!!
Follow these very important steps when you have so many words of wisdom to impart to Cardi B but just can’t because she is famous and successful unlike you. At least you can now look inwards and potentially figure out why you feel the need to criticize other people’s life choices? Just kidding, find another woman to aggressively teach!