The weather’s getting warmer so you know what that means: It’s time to get all up in those rooftop parties, girl! ‘Tis the season to walk up six flights of stairs to reach a roof where you can pour all types of rosé and light cocktails down your cute little craw until you’re so fucking wasted, you literally almost fall off the roof and tumble to your death. Here are the chicest rooftop parties to almost die at this summer:
Becca’s Housewarming
Becca just moved into a dank-ass luxury low-rise so you know what that means: a half-indoor, half-outdoor housewarming party is on the way and that roof is gonna be open for business. Get blasted on vodka tonics until you are practically shouting for more of those “beautiful refreshing drinks.” Try to impress Becca’s new next-door neighbor Gavin by telling him you used to be a gymnast, and prove it by doing a series of cartwheels where you fall off the roof and into traffic below. You won’t die, but you’ll definitely be so dizzy you’ll barf all over Gavin’s khakis!
Rooftop Rave
One of the hottest summer parties is a psychedelic rave that takes place at the rooftop bar of an exclusive New York club. After three or nine shots of tequila, you’ll feel bold enough to ask the Ryan Gosling lookalike by the bar to meet you on the dance floor. By the time you smash him up against a wall to stick your tongue down his precious throat, you’ll be too hammered to realize there is no wall, just hip-height railing that’s just made of fused-together glo-sticks. Luckily those glo-sticks will break your fall so that you only lose your purse over the side of the building. That was a close one!
Sangria Fiesta
If you’re looking for a classier rooftop affair, try out the monthly Sangria Fiesta at hotspot El Castillo, where you can get so fucking blitzed on sangria that you’ll think you actually traveled to Spain. After making friends with literally everyone at the fiesta, offer to stay pen pals with them and bid tearful farewells before boarding your flight home. Luckily, your behavior will raise enough red flags that when you try to literally step off the roof to “become the plane,” five strong men will pull you back and take you down to ground level so they can put you in an Uber where you belong. Gracias, strangers!
Your Own Roof
If you have access to your roof, or even if you don’t, your own rooftop is the perfect place for the summer party of a lifetime! All you need are some friends and some booze, but mostly some booze to create a kickass atmosphere that’s also an absolute deathtrap. After you’re nearly blacked out, drag your dining room table up there to play some flip-cup—and loser has to try to parkour and jump to the next building. Luckily, just as you’re revving up to make your leap and inevitably perish, a cranky neighbor in the building will come up to complain about the noise. What a party pooper!
Summer is all about saying yes and having fun, so don’t miss out on these rooftop parties you’ll almost die at!
