Summer is quickly coming to an end (sorry!). Soon enough you’ll finally be able to stop shaving off your shameful body and facial hair, and instead hide it under layers and layers of cable knit. Until then, we have all the hottest ingrown hair styles, so you can march confidently out into the streets and say, “Hey world! My body is attacking itself! Ain’t it sexy?!”
The Ingrown Bob
Despite popular belief, the bob isn’t just a style for the hairs that actually break through your skin. The ingrown bob is like lip liner made of pustules, and will make you look like Bob, that creepy dude from your high school who liked climbing trees a little too much. Keep in mind that you will be in just as much physical anguish as he was in emotional anguish, but that shouldn’t stop you from rocking this look. What are you going to do, not hurt yourself for fashion? Yeah right!
The Ingrown Rachel
This isn’t the classic choppy hair look inspired by your favorite 90s sitcom character, so why is it called The Rachel? Simple! If you shave your armpits every day for a week, the only thing you’ll be able to do is sit at home with your arms above your head, watching old episodes of Friends on Netflix. If you have a high pain threshold you might be able to squeeze out an Instagram so at least your followers will know how dedicated you are to fashion. Sun’s out, bumps out, ladies!
For this look you’ll need just the right bikini to show off your ingrown pubes. The perfect suit will tease just one or two of those ingrown hairs to let the fellas know that you are both well groomed and in a lot of pain! This style will give your face a subtle look of panic that will have every lifeguard on the beach Baywatch-ing it to your rescue.
The Ingrown Marilyn
There’s no better way to achieve understated glamour than to emulate the classic beauty of Marilyn Monroe. If you shave your mustache in just the right spots, your ingrown hairs will look like beauty marks. Voila! You’re the belle of the ball. Now get out there and let your ingrown hairs blow in the manhole steam like Marilyn would. Just don’t forget to keep your face very still to minimize the stinging that comes with doing something so very unnatural to your body!
Now you’re ready to take on the end of summer. Take your luscious ingrown locks out on the town with any of these classic ‘dos that say, “Ouchies!”