Spooky ghosts and goblins popping out of haunted houses might get you in the mood for Halloween this season, but spooky fall boners popping out of nowhere will simply get you in the mood…for sex! Thanks to the half-dressed nurses, witches, and jungle creatures parading around at every turn, there will be hundreds of spooky boners to choose from. That’s why we’ve curated a list of our favorite fall boners to help get you into the season:
The Boner from It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown
One of the all-time classic holiday boners, Charlie Brown and the gang’s trick-or-treating boners are almost half a century old now. But some things never change: Charlie ends up with a huge, spooky boner, and Linus believes in the power of the Great Boner. Checking out this holiday classic will really get you going.
Most of the Boners from The Nightmare Before Christmas
Sure, there are plenty of tired old boners for you to choose from. Thriller Boner? You know it by heart. Monster Boner Mash? Not again! But The Boner Before Christmas really stands the test of time. Check out this spooky fall boner and really set the tone.
The Suggested Boners from Hocus Pocus
During a Halloween in Salem, Mass., three magical boners are accidentally summoned, as a young man tries to impress the girl of his dreams with what is implied to be his enormous, commanding boner. How can you not get in the mood with this Holiday classic!?
By now you’re pretty over the Paranormal Activity series, but let’s be honest, the first one was on-point, boner-wise. The “live” aspect used made the ghosty boners feel personal and creepy, while the unseen boner creates a spooky atmosphere that’ll have you begging for more!
No matter your holiday plans, be sure to incorporate some of these spooky boners to get yourself in the Halloween spirit…hard!