Shy Woman Lets Loose at Office Party By Food-Shaming Her Coworkers

During her recent office holiday party, terminally shy woman Lauren Cornell decided to let loose and open up to her coworkers by commenting on every single thing they put in their mouths.


“I don’t usually let people see me like this,” said Lauren. “But I figured if it’s only once a year, it’s okay to let my hair down a bit and get a little food-shamey.”


Though it began with an off-handed dig at the coworker who had gone back for seconds of the baked ziti, the wild, wacky, completely unsolicited comments quickly escalated.


“A guy from marketing was eating almost all of the smoked salmon toasts,” she said. “I was like, wow it’s like you’re obsessed with salmon toasts, huh, buddy? I guess things got pretty crazy!”


Lauren’s coworkers don’t seem to share the same enthusiasm for her antics.


“I don’t really know her that well because she usually keeps to herself,” says coworker Melissa Porch. “But her going around and food-shaming all of us was a super weird way to attempt to bond with people.”


“Yeah, I’d never even heard her speak before the holiday party,” added coworker Peter Abrams. “But she came up to me and asked why I’d skipped over the veggies when making my plate. It seemed like she was trying to make me feel bad about it? It was definitely weird but also she seemed really free and like, happier than I’ve ever seen her? It was kind of messed up. Maybe next time she should let loose by having a drink or two instead.”


“Maybe this is what she’s been quietly thinking about all this time?” added Porch.



Despite the negative feedback, it appears that Lauren had a great time.


“It was so refreshing to be able to have fun with my coworkers by calling them out in a silly way,” she said. “I can’t wait until next year. Maybe I’ll bring a bunch of personal pizzas and then threaten to get out a scale while I hand them out!”


At the time of publication, it was unclear whether Ms. Cornell would still have this job by next year’s party.