Hot girl summer, vaxxed girl summer, white boy summer, and really any other summer can move the fuck over, because there’s a new summer in season and it’s all about pork. Why? Because this girl Ellie Lewis likes pork.
“Yeah, I like pork,” says Ellie. “It tastes really good.”
Yes, bitch!! This summer BELONGS to you and your pork loving ass.
“I don’t think it’s, like, the main thing about me,” says Pork Queen. “I started a new job last month, I recently realized I’m bi, and this is crazy but I actually just learned how to ride a bike. Maybe for me it’s the summer of one of those things?”
Mmm, mmm, mmm. It’s Pig Husbandry Pride from June to August and maybe even the beginning of September if it’s still really hot, and we can all thank Ellie Lewis of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Say more about that!
“Okay, I guess I like pork chops, and I like prosciutto.”
OINK OINK OINK, GIRLIE! This summer we’re dripping in pork juice. But for a lot of Jews, Muslims, and vegetarians that’s not an option, so Ellie should really be mindful of that, actually.
“Oh, my God, I’m not trying to make anyone eat pork,” Mrs. Pork says. “I just like it, it’s not even like I eat it all the time.”
Whoa, shockingly defensive. What else is up with this pig meat influencer?
“Pork girl summer,” says Ellie Lewis. “And I demand it on the record if you use that quote that you also explain that you asked me to say it upward of seven times and refused to leave my yard until I did.”
Well you heard the woman, PORK GIRL SUMMER FOREVER!
