With a few styling tricks, you can wear the same simple maxi dress for a month and it won’t be considered a cry for help. All you need is $19.99 and one failed dream to dwell upon! Now, let us show you how to accessorize the dress AND ward off the inevitable questions about your well-being.
Since your friends and coworkers haven’t seen you in the new dress yet, go ahead and wear it alone and proud. Just like you! Soak up the compliments like a pillow soaking up tears.
Wear the exact same outfit as yesterday and don’t shower. Looks like someone had a big night last night! Take a little snooze on your desk for effect. For more long-term fun, turn your fake hookup into a fake meaningful relationship and continue this for four more days.
Small accessories will keep inquiring minds at bay. Throw a brooch on to let them know you still have some sense of your surroundings.
Add a scarf to show everyone you’re still holding your head up. Burrow in there and rest anytime you need comfort today. Remember: your body can also be your bed.
Layer your dress for maximum outfit potential! Add bed sheets or a comforter to the ensemble. Your loved ones will know for sure that you’ve been sleeping in the dress, and you get to cozy up in your own emotional transparency!
Start tearing up sections of the dress and show it to your coworkers as “your new look.” They’ll be too afraid to criticize.
Cut your maxi dress into a mini dress and have everyone looking at your mysterious bruises and your years-long battle with shingles.
BONUS TIP: If you happen to get sent to a mental facility after Day 30, these tips also work on hospital-issued cotton gowns and slippers!