In my experience, the stigma surrounding depression can feel oppressive. Though I sometimes feel empowered to talk about my struggle with mental health, too often other people suggest ways to try and help me. Yes, sometimes I get depressed. Sometimes it puts my life at a standstill. Sometimes I feel completely lost. But here’s the thing: it’s not your business. So stop trying to tell me what to do to make me feel better—unless we’re talking crystals.
Let me be clear: if you suggest that I give myself a serotonin boost with exercise or try talk therapy, that’s not okay. But, if you interrupt me when I’m sharing that I can barely get out of bed in the morning to tell me what type of quartz to keep under my pillow for mental balance, yes, that is something I want to hear. That’s a legit helpful piece of advice.
Women are all too frequently told what to do with their minds and bodies, and people’s insistence on telling us how to manage our mental health is an extension of that. So just listen to how we’re feeling, and then back the hell off, unless you can recommend a decent grounding stone for use during my attempts at lucid dreaming. Whenever I try to use my tiger’s eye, I just end up sleeping normally and I’m on the lookout for something new! I am taking care of myself!
Look, I get it. It’s hard to watch people you love suffer. But you don’t know their exact circumstances. Some people are too depressed to get out of bed to go to the gym. Some people have financial constraints that prevent them from finding a therapist. Some people need a sincere recommendation about how to best pry my third eye open with some primo lapis lazuli so I can see if I was cursed into my current condition. Mama need them crystals!
Talking about depression is never easy, both for the sufferers and for the people who love them. So remember: if I open up to you about my struggle, the kindest thing you can do for me is just listen… and then fold a carnelian crystal in my palm, knowing full well that orange crystals promote joy and work with the vibrancy of the sun to foster the ideal level of vibrational healing. That’s all a depressed person needs: friendship, support, and crystals.