Hello. Me cavewoman look for caveman. But caveman like other cavewoman. He never like me. He say he like me friend.
Look. I funny cavewoman. It keep caveman away. Grug!
Other cavewoman pretty and boring and laugh at caveman jokes. He like other cavewoman a lot. I funny sometime. Caveman not laugh. No caveman ever laugh. Caveman find pretty boring girl and I look at tiger and think, “Fuck you, tiger.”
I think about, and here is chart for caveman for get woman:
Ugly + Boring = No
Pretty + Boring = Yes
Ugly + Funny = No
Pretty + Funny = Yes until find out funny then no
Friend Leeps pretty and boring. She get many caveman date. She tell Oosa (me Oosa) you get caveman someday. So I laugh at dumb thing. I try be boring. It not work. Maybe not pretty enough be boring. Friend Queet say be meself. I be meself. Going pretty good. Tell one joke. Caveman go away. Caveman go try and fuck Queet.
Then caveman steal joke and tell Queet and Queet laugh so much sleep with him. Caveman win. I look at tiger. “Dumbfuck tiger,” I say. Tiger growl.
I say Queet and Leeps, what so great about cavemen who steal joke. Leeps and Queet like good jokes. Make laugh very important. Cavemen not like laugh at Oosa. Cavemen only make laugh. Oosa funny caveman angry go away.
Oosa hope smart future caveperson say truth why caveman not like funny cavewoman. Caveman say cavewoman like funny caveman and funny cavewoman not exist. Then caveman shove funny cavewoman in hole. He say listen to caveman caveman funny, mate now.
Oosa wish another life when Oosa not funny and find love. Oosa have decide be self with lonely or be boring find love. Oosa not find good choice. May try fake someone else.
But first here joke for you:
I put slippery moose hide on ground. You step on hide. You slip. Laugh laugh laugh.
Caveman go away.
Oosa alone. Hello tiger.
Now cry.
