Man Who Likes to Choke Girlfriend During Sex Complains About Getting Dragged to Sephora

In a fun and interesting twist this week, Matt Crane, a 34-year-old man who likes to choke his girlfriend during sex, complained about getting dragged to a Sephora by his girlfriend, Emma.


Matt’s girlfriend, a soft-spoken librarian who’s put up with Matt’s psychosexual quirks for years, wanted to stop in Sephora to pick up some face wash. Matt, who can’t get off unless he has Emma in a full chokehold, complained that a trip to Sephora was “dumb” and “not a part of the day we had planned.”


Emma was quick to point out that she, too, is often surprised by Matt’s sudden change of plans. “For example, sometimes we’re having sex and it’s great, and then suddenly he chokes me,” she said, “I’ve consented and do feel safe with him but it’s like, come on, dude. You owe me.”



Unfortunately, Matt was unwilling to budge, making annoyed sounds like a child, and threatening to stay in the car.


“It just felt like I didn’t have a say in where we were going,” said Matt, who previously dated a slew of women who refused to put up with his aggressive fetish. “I hate getting dragged into places and forced to do stuff that I don’t enjoy.” Like running an errand with his committed girlfriend who he chokes during sex because he feels inadequate at his job.


Emma eventually agreed to order her face wash online stating, “Sometimes I just give him what he wants because if not he weeps and it’s honestly so dumb.”