Is He The One, Or An Old-Timey Railway Scamp Looking For A Place to Stay?

New relationships are fun and exciting, but they bring with them a whole new set of questions. Even when things are going well, you’re left to wonder: is he the one you’re going to spend the rest of your life with, or has he simply run out of boxcars to stay in as he rides the rails throughout the country? Ask yourself these questions to be certain of his viability as your ultimate romantic partner.


Does he show up with flowers, or with all of his belongings in a bindle?

Sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference between a hopeless romantic and a man who’s lived on trains, by choice, for the past decade. Does your dude bring you your favorite flowers, or does he simply show up, always around dinner time, with his meager belongings bundled up and attached to a stick? Remember: If he brings a bindle, it’s not so much that he’s devoted to you, as he is devoted to having a place to camp out for the season.


Does he ask how your day was, or does he sing mournful songs about how he was once a man of great status?

You know you’ve found a great guy when he asks, “How was your day?” and really listens to your answer. But if he spends the majority of your time together playing harmonica and singing about losing his fortune to “the sauce,” it’s he’s more likely planned a future of being married to the rails than married to you.



Does he write you cute love notes, or does he carve symbols into your mailbox indicating that this is a friendly place to stay?

Does your man send you sweet texts throughout the day? If so, he’s a keeper! There’s nothing better than a guy who reminds you of his love by sending you sweet nothings. If, on the other hand, he prefers to carve symbols into your mailbox to let other rail-riders know that hot meals are available at your home, send him back to the rail yard. He’s just not into you for you. He’s into you for your scraps.


When you’re not together, does he have his own hobbies, or does he eat beans out of a can on your porch until you get home?

Spending time apart is healthy, and it’s important that you each have your own hobbies, If your guy has nothing to do and nothing to eat but beans, that’s a huge red flag. It may seem adorable at first but do you really want a future with someone who sits around idly, whittling and telling stories about the Dust Bowl?


Does his name contain the word “boxcar” or the name of a state?

Is your guy named “Colorado Smoky”, “Ned From North Dakota” or “Boxcar Jim”? With rare exception, if you find yourself uttering these words regularly, you’ve found yourself in a railway scamp situation. Sorry to burst your bubble but he probably isn’t the quirky man of your dreams, but is a reckless rapscallion of the road.


It’s hard to find a good man, but remember: you deserve a solid companion who likes you for you, not because your apartment is a source of respite from the uncertain and often lonely life of the rails. Go out and get him!