Respecting people’s fucked up little boundaries is a necessary part of respecting the cute little notion of their humanity. But sorry, folks: People do it for you, and you have to do it, too! So even though you’re totally wondering why your friend said, “Hey, could you not do that?” over something so silly and fucked up, here’s how to respect their weird little boundaries, anyway:
Remember that setting boundaries takes a lot of energy, no matter how stupid those boundaries are.
You have to respect the fact that setting boundaries takes a lot of thought, effort, and emotional energy (no matter how much you’re like, “seriously?????”) and you would want the same respect for your time and energy, right? Even if you put time and energy into something idiotic, like building a replica of the Friends set out of Legos? Now apply that kind of respect onto their boundaries and just kind of deal with your bullshit later.
Your boundaries are probably stupid and fucked up to somebody else.
Think about your own boundaries for a minute: Are they maybe just a little bit stupid and fucked up? At least one of them might be to someone who isn’t you. Now think of the other person’s stupid and fucked up boundaries. Can you just kind of shut up and deal with it for once in the hopes that someone might respect your “no unexpected phone calls” thing? Admit it: That’s a little stupid and fucked up, but it sure means a lot to you when people respect it, right? Okay, so again: Shut the fuck up.
Remind yourself that ultimately, we’re all a little stupid and fucked up.
Look around you: Everyone you know and see is a little stupid and fucked up and beautiful in their own way, right? What makes us special as precious little human beings is that we’re all precious flowers and embarrassing dorks, which means we all have a few boundaries that are fucking LOL. But remember last week when you were like, “Please don’t touch my Lego replica of the Friends set” and your friends were like “Ok….” And then they didn’t touch it and everyone was fine? Just apply that to everyone else’s boundaries and you’ll be just fine.
Respecting someone’s precious little boundaries can be annoying, but you can still do it! Just remember that boundaries are ultimately good and you should have them too. Good luck, you precious little snowflake!