How to Make Your Hookup Last as Long as Your Manicure

Nothing is more frustrating than getting it on with the handsome stranger at Jessica’s party only to have him finish in a few minutes and head out the door in less time than it would take you to accidentally chip a nail on the faucet. But with the right steps, that moment of passion can turn into a lingering connection that rivals the steadfastness of a gel manicure. Yes, your hook up and the manicure you got before the party where you met him can last 10 days! Here’s how:


Put In the Prep Work

Take advantage of his social obligation to text you out of manners the morning after by dropping hints for future interactions before you’ve even let him into your bedroom—applying a base coat, if you will. Then, push him on it, asking if he might wanna grab coffee sometime, the same way you would push down a cuticle with an orange stick. That way, there will be less resistance to file down tomorrow morning when you casually ask him to grab breakfast.



Reapply as Needed

Continuing to see him may seem like it takes an annoying amount of upkeep, but it will be worth it for the long-lasting wear you’ll get out of him. Reapply that basic physical attraction you felt by texting him the next day to let him know he can “drop by” if he “feels like it.” No need to go full force—this is just a touch up.


Smooth Over Chips

Nails are prone to chipping from daily activities, and hook ups are prone to chipping as you both go about your lives. Any cracks in his feelings for you should be smoothed over immediately. When he seems hesitant to make weekend plans, smooth on good topcoat of denial and insist that you’re really horny.



Admit Defeat

A hookup, like a manicure, can’t last forever. When you first went for it at that party, you told yourself you didn’t care, but now you have to admit that you fell a little bit in love, just like when your manicurist did that ombré thing that you could never seem to make happen on your own. But now it’s day eight, your polish is almost completely gone, and Adam’s feelings are clearly starting to fade. Every time you receive a lazy “lol”, and angrily scratch at your polish, you’ll be that much closer to heading back to the salon and wrangling a new man.


With these tips, we guaranteed that he won’t break your heart unless you break a nail!