There comes a time in every woman’s life where she has to stop dating men who are bad for her. It’s not easy, but it is possible and I know because I’m living proof.
That’s right: last year, I decided to stop dating men that are bad for me. No one thought it was possible, but I made it work. I stopped for eight (almost nine) months before I started dating shitty guys again. But I did stop for a while, so go me!
The first thing I did was recognize the bad signs as they appeared, instead of ignoring them for months until they became a problem. Once I learned to deal with the red flags as soon as they popped up, I wasn’t wasting time with shitty dudes anymore. Also I have to emphasize that I didn’t date anyone for eight (almost nine) months. Most of that time I was playing solitaire under a tree and catching up on The Good Wife. But the important thing was that I STOPPED DATING MEN I KNEW WERE BAD FOR ME, right up until I started again. No men ever tried to date me under the tree. And then when one did, I started dating him even though he wouldn’t tell me his full name, just his middle name and first initial.
It’s hard to break the cycle, but if you focus on yourself, you can break it for eight (almost night) months and then immediately start it back up again. That’s the thing about cycles. You can’t really break them forever, because they’re cycles, duh! That’s why I’m back to the grind.
The most important step to doing this is to value yourself. You KNOW you don’t need the attention of a troubled guy to confirm that you are amazing! All you need is to look in the mirror and remind yourself that you are worthy of quality love that makes you feel good, at least for awhile until things start to get really hard again. That’s how I did it. And for basically nine months, it worked.
You can cut the bad energy from your own life if you make simple changes in your life, like avoiding eye contact with baristas and all of your friend’s friends and drinking and most public settings. When you inevitably go back to just flopping your pussy around willy nilly, know that you couldn’t have gotten there unless you stopped and realized how much it sucked being by yourself.
Trust me. I went through years of dealing with liars and manipulators before I figured out how to stop making the same mistakes. But now that I’ve figured it out, I know that I’ll be able to figure it out again after I stop fucking this guy while he’s texting his ex girlfriend. And if I can, then so can you!
