Having a conjoined twin is wonderful. There is nobody better for sharing secrets, as well as organs. But what happens when your twin and her boyfriend start to get freaky? Unless he also has a hot conjoined twin, you’re going to have to distract yourself for a while. Never fear! We have a couple of great games to help you pass the time while they finish having sex.
2048
This simple sliding puzzle game has taken the world by storm. The ever-shifting board makes for an engrossing play and will help you avoid making accidental eye contact. That’s especially useful when your twin’s boyfriend wants to try doggy style, but you share a back with her.
Candy Crush Saga
This deliciously addictive game has become a huge hit with casual gamers. Its laid-back pace will help you weather even an all day fuck-a-thon. Also, a lot of the candies look like prophylactics, which should help remind your sister that you probably won’t survive a pregnancy.
Mahjong
Sometimes the classics are the best. An ancient game of strategy and memory, Mahjong is a wonderful option for when your twin and her boyfriend and doing it in the missionary position. If you don’t have a flat or non-moving surface to play the board game, online versions have a player chat option to connect with players from around the world. Human contact is great at a time when you paradoxically feel so alone.
The Room Two
A sequel to the hit puzzle box game, The Room Two finds you moving from room to room solving a series of interlocking clues. The heavily tactile gameplay will help you take your mind off of the fact that you currently have no one to run their hands over your body. Make sure to plug in your headphones to check out the haunting soundtrack – and to block out the screams of passion that feel like they’re coming from the inside.
Remember: Boyfriends come and go, but you and your twin are fused at the vertebrae.
