Cool Skater Girl Momentarily Mistaken for Loser Skater Boy

Witnesses confirm that cool skater girl Izzy Brooks was momentarily mistaken for a loser skater boy while skating through Washington Square Park last Thursday.


Brooks, who wears her hair short and was donning an androgynous outfit at the time, left some thinking she was just another miscreant, aging man-child as she whizzed by on her board.


However, sighs of relief and appreciation could be heard as lookers-on realized she was, in fact, a seriously cool young woman.


“I was having my lunch in the park when she skated by,” said one witness, Lucia Steele. “At first glance, I was totally irritated, cause as far as I’m concerned, skaters are all certified fuck boys.”


But a mere split second later, Steele’s attitude transformed as Brooks turned a corner and revealed she had been a cool-as-fuck and admirable woman skater the whole time.



“What an incredible reveal,” Steele said. “Just like that, she went from someone I would never swipe right on to someone way too cool to ever swipe right on me.”


Additional witnesses agreed that everything about Brooks from her reckless skating to her big pants initially struck them as tired and unappealing, until they realized she was a woman and consequently one of the coolest people they would see that day.


“At first I was like, this lame skater boy really has a dagger stick-and-poke on his arm? Give me a break,” said Roseanna Reese. “But then I was like wow, this sick-ass skater girl has a dagger stick-and-poke and it looks absolutely incredible. I want one.”


When asked about the perception whiplash she caused in the park, Brooks reported that such reactions are a common occurrence.


“Learning how to skate as a young girl was extra hard because the scene was so male-dominated,” said Brooks. “And the culture still has a long way to go in terms of inclusivity. But, yeah, I guess I have the advantage of being seen as much cooler than my male counterparts by most women.”


“And honestly?” Brooks continued. “I’ll take it.”