In unsurprising news out of your home office, your boss Lydia has once again interrupted your job search with a very reasonable question related to the work you’re actually paid to do.
“She’s always micromanaging my hunt for a different, better job!” you told reporters, after closing out of several browser tabs open to job listings, plus several others dedicated to online shopping. “Granted, she thinks I’m doing the work I expressly said I was doing, but that just proves how ineffective micromanaging is!”
You informed reporters that you’re barely able to get through a full eight hours of applying to other jobs without your boss checking in with you at least once.
“She’s always G-chatting me being like ‘Did you see my email?’ and ‘This project was due two weeks ago, do you have a status update?’” you said. “And it’s just like, I’m sick of being so strictly regulated, you know? I just wish that if I did have a weeks-late status update, Lydia would trust me to get it to her without having to remind me upwards of two times.”
Sources confirmed that your boss does, in fact, have a penchant for sending kindly-worded follow-up emails when she doesn’t hear from an employee about a project for several business days.
“It’s suffocating!” you added while applying mascara in preparation for a Zoom interview that you scheduled for 2 p.m. on a Tuesday and didn’t take time off for. “I don’t know why she can’t just trust that I’m going to get my work done, as soon as I’m finished interviewing for a job that will pay me more to do said work.”
You told reporters that your job search isn’t the only thing your boss has interrupted with her absurd requests that you do your job.
“One time she messaged me while I was getting my nails done, asking me if I could send her a spreadsheet,” you said. “It’s like, um, no, I’m getting my nails done? I don’t have nearly enough bandwidth to take on another thing. I just wish she’d understand that.”
At press time, your boss had politely requested you meet with her to discuss ways she could help you with the project you’re working on. Unfortunately, you had to push it back a few weeks, as your calendar was already fully booked with second-round interviews.
