In an inevitable story coming out of Queens, New York, 34-year-old Phaedra Marks has reached adulthood and is starting to realize why her mom was like that.
“For so much of my childhood I was like, ‘Why is my mom like that?’ Just in general, you know?” Phaedra told reporters gathered at the scene. “Anyway, it was my 34th birthday last week, and I think I finally get it. I think I completely understand why she was like that, and I’m honestly ashamed it’s taken me this long.”
A collection of small moments over the past year has started to make it clear to Phaedra why her mom was like that. For example, sources confirm that Phaedra asked her husband, Brandon, to move the chicken out of the freezer and into the fridge by the time she came home, only to find he had not done so by 7 p.m.
“I was furious. After an impossibly long day at work, my whole dinner plan was ruined because he couldn’t remember a simple task,” she continued. “And then I realized, ‘Oh, yeah, this is why my mom acted like that.’”
But it’s not just the chicken incident – Phaedra has found herself bombarded on all sides by a new understanding for and kinship with her mother.
“My mom used to nag me endlessly about booking a flight home from college early, and I would never do it more than three weeks in advance,” she said. “This year, I had to buy a flight for Thanksgiving, and in mid-March, I found myself thinking, ‘Better book that flight before it gets expensive.’ What the fuck? That’s nine months away!”
Phaedra’s tone then became more solemn. “Wait, shit…that’s only nine months away.”
“Listen, I remember when this happened with my mother, too,” said Phaedra’s mom, Gina Preston. “You hit 34 and suddenly, your mom starts to make way more sense. It’s the age when you start getting anxious if someone touches the walls of your house. It’s the age when you invest in a really nice duster.”
“I think I assumed my mom was just reacting poorly to a just, honest world, but now I realize she was reacting reasonably to a greatly unjust one,” Phaedra continued after stubbing her toe on the corner of her bed and bursting into tears, much like her mom would do when Phaedra was a child.
As of press time, Phaedra and her brother, Cleo, still do not understand why their dad was like that.
