6 Things You’ll Eat on the Way Home from Work Tonight

You should wait until you get home to eat a nutritious and healthy dinner after a long day at work. But you could also pick up a few delicious snacks to reward yourself for getting through that long day and eat them on the way home. Resist if you must, but this is what you’ll probably be eating in your car or on the bus tonight:

 

1. An Apple Stolen from the Fruit Bowl at Work

Yes, the fruit bowl in the meeting room is only for clients, but you’ve had a long day meeting with those needy idiots and you can’t face the journey ahead without a little something. It may not be healthy to assert your dominance in this way, but it sure is healthy to eat fresh produce. You’re snacking on an apple—what a responsible adult you’ve become! All adults do this.

 

2. A Candy Bar on the Subway

You’re still ravenous after your first course of fruit, so choose a candy bar to pep you up for the long journey home. The best food is enjoyed in secret, so eat the bar surreptitiously while surrounded by a car full of angry, hungry commuters. This is going to happen so just let it.

 

 

3. Fries from the Train Station “Cafe” 

Chances are you’ll be ready for something savory after the candy rush. Get yourself a serving of fries from whichever fast food joint smells greasiest. Order a small serving—it’s just a snack, remember! Eat them fast without thinking—you don’t want to think to hard about this because it will surely happen regardless.

 

4. Five Cookies from the Box You Bought to Share with Your Roommates

You’re a generous and considerate roommate and you know Amy and Tara love triple chocolate chip cookies. You’re so fun and kind! Buy a pack, and just eat five or so while you’re waiting for your next train. Six max. Definitely stop at seven. This is most of the box but ugh whatever you’re doing this. Just go for it.

 

5. Half the Tortilla Chips from the Supersize Bag You’re Buying for the Party on Friday

They say the best experiences are shared. Not true when it comes to a party-size bag of tortilla chips. Wolf them down while you’re walking home through your neighborhood. Our bodies need salt to survive, and you need it to get through this last stretch of your commute. Submit to your needs.

 

6. A Mint You Found in Your Pocket

Where did the mint come from and how long has it been in your pocket? Stop overthinking it. You need to freshen your breath after all those snacks so that your roommates don’t realize how much you ate on your way home.

 

It’s not that you’re rewarding yourself with food—but these things are basically going to be eaten whether you want them to or not. Now, what’s for dinner?