5 Sex Noises You Can Accidentally Make Anywhere

Guys love the sound of sex, especially in the most unexpected places. Make sure every man in your life knows exactly what noises you make in bed by accidentally making them in your normal, everyday life! Your rampant moans and groans will have them wanting to make you moan and groan in a sex-related way. Here’s how:


Lift a heavy bag.

Your trip to the grocery store is about to get steamy! Lifting a heavy bag is an acceptable way to grunt like an elephant who’s ready for a night of loud and boisterous lovemaking. Alternatively, hoisting your carry-on into the overhead compartment allows the whole plane to hear you grunt like a sex-crazed, wild hog. Looks like you’re the in-flight entertainment today, missy! Enjoy the stares.


Stretch at your desk.

Who says loud sex noises aren’t conducive to the workplace environment? Try sitting still at your desk all morning, and then have a big, vocal stretch—you won’t believe the strained moans of pleasure that come out of you as you release that muscular tension…or sexual tension, as every guy on your floor will be thinking! Oops!




There’s nothing like flu, hay fever, or a severe dust allergy to give a girl an opportunity to sneeze hard enough to knock something over. The guys around you won’t be able to get enough of those eruptions, and you’ll be too busy blowing your nose to notice…or will you??


Climb a lot of stairs really fast.

You know that super-sexy breathless pant you get when you run up stairs? Combined with the sweat forming on your forehead, this is your way of telling every guy in the vicinity that you like your men the way you like your exercise: hard. In addition to being a great way to meet guys on the subway, climbing stairs is also the only way to get out of the subway.


Be surprised.

That gasp you let out when 65 people “Like” your unretouched selfie is so close to your “Is this D even going to fit?” gasp that no guy will be able to tell the difference. You’ll also gasp in a horny-sounding way if you stumble upon something horrifying, like your landlady’s body in the hallway. So put your jaded attitude on the shelf and get shocked! Men love sex sounds.


Don’t get self-conscious about being a walking, talking, sex-sound machine. You know those guys at the gym who groan loudly as they lift weights that are too heavy for them? That’s the sound they make when they’re taking a dump—and they don’t care!