Author Archives for Janie Beaufore

Woman Blocks Off Afternoon to Put Duvet Cover Back On

How to Fix Highlights That Are a Little Too Light by Manically Box Dying Your Hair Black

Nice! Cobwebs in Apartment Now Count as Seasonal Decoration

RFK Laments That People With Autism Might Never Get to Do Normal Things Like Dump a Dead Bear in Central Park

Affordable Box Dyes That Will Result in a $500 Color Correction

Elon Musk Treasuring All the Quality Time He Getting to Spend With Human Shield

Woman Worries AI Could Take Her Job Since It Can Also Produce Subpar Material After Several Prompts

Manager Encourages Female Employee to Speak Up so It’s Easier to Steal Her Ideas

Woman Takes Four Pills to Treat Headache That Could Have Been Cured With Single Sip of Water

Haircut Cannot Be Accurately Assessed Until Woman Styles It Herself

How to Stop Slouching by Just Lying All the Way Down

An Inside Look at This Seven-Thousand-Dollar-Per-Night Hotel

How to Forgive Your Roommate for Getting in the Shower When You Were Considering Getting in the Shower

Sephora a Little Upset That No One Has Gotten Them a Birthday Gift

BDSM Queen! This Woman Is Choking

Go Girl! This Woman Is Still Employed Despite Decades of Rampant Incompetence

Elaborate Lies to Get Out of Something You Could Have Said No to Without an Explanation

Nation’s Men With Big Snakes Make Triumphant Return to Local Parks