Woman Spends Entire Day Getting Ready to Take a Walk

In a developing story out of Brooklyn, it appears 25-year-old Kelsey Gannon will spend yet another full day getting ready to take a short walk outside.


“It’s just not as simple as it used to be,” said Kelsey. “It requires a lot prep, physically and emotionally, to go outside. I’m wiped by the time I’m ready to leave.”


Kelsey, who has already been making arrangements for her casual stroll for upwards of three-and-a-half hours, explains the struggle to make her way outside.


“Well, first I have to spend some time researching whether it’s even okay for me to leave the house right now,” she said. “Then, once I’m sure that it is, I have to figure out what protective steps I need to take: mask, gloves, distance? Is it cold? Are people going to try to talk to me?”


“And don’t even get me started on coordinating my mask with my outfit,” Kelsey added.


“I asked her yesterday if she wanted to go for a walk today, and she was so enthusiastic,” said Alana Stewart, Kelsey’s roommate. “Now it’s today, and it’s 3pm, and there has been no movement from her end whatsoever.”


“I’m glad she’s taking social distancing seriously, but she might be taking going for a short walk around the block a little too seriously.”



As far as Kelsey’s day goes, time is certainly running out.


“I mean, now that I’ve determined I can leave the house, chosen my protective equipment, sanitized all of my clothing, picked out a supportive pair of shoes, confirmed that my parents are okay with me leaving home, eaten two heart and energy-giving meals, and packed a backup hand sanitizer, it’s like 8pm,” she said. “And kinda cold.”


“Maybe I’ll try again all tomorrow,” Kelsey added.