Bangs can look fabulous, but they can also be super hard to maintain on a daily basis—especially because they look like they’ve been smeared in Vaseline 15 minutes after you left the house. But worry no more! Here are a few quick tips for styling your bangs to make them look amazing—before they get completely fucking ruined by your gross oil factory of a body, of course!
Straight Across
A blunt cut makes for a classic look with serious retro flare. Just blow-dry them straight down and spritz 2-3 pumps of hairspray to keep them in place, until you inevitably touch them with your hands in a futile attempt to keep them in place. This, of course, transfers the oils from your hands to your bangs—and remember, they’re already soaking up all that forehead grease! Now you’ve turned what could have been 45 whole minutes of rockin’ bangs to 20 minutes at most. Great job!
Swept to the Side
Side-swept bangs are flattering for almost every face shape and create a beautifully soft, feminine style. But be careful—they’ll also soak up all that forehead lube faster than you can say, “Why the fuck did I get bangs again?” Oil reflects light, too, so you’ll look absolutely luminous in pictures—the bad kind!
Pin Them Back
Nothing says, “I got bangs thinking they would be an exciting style choice and now I deeply regret it because they are absolutely impossible to live with” like pinning them back! Just grab some bobby pins or a barrette of your choice and clip them away from your face. But careful, bangs cause your forehead to produce more oil on a daily basis regardless of whether or not they’re pinned back, so your forehead will still be greasy until your dum-dum body figures out what the hell it’s doing. Now you not only won’t have cute bangs, but your forehead will have the off-putting sheen of a fevered marathon runner. Better to give up now!
Twist Them Back
Twisting your bangs back is a lot like pinning them, but it makes you feel like a princess who went on vacation with her family to Turks and Caicos! But your forehead will still glisten like a filthy hobbit, of course. Nothing can change that.
Add Some Leave-in Conditioner
This senseless tip is kind of like seeing a burning fire and saying, “I’ll help!” while dousing the fire in lighter fluid. But try it, anyway! You’re already going to scream into a pillow and cancel your plans because you are so fucking done with this shit anyway, so why not try this first?
So there you have it! A few simple tips for rocking your bangs before they look like shit less than an hour from now. Happy styling!
