Unborn Baby Shown Grimacing in Womb As Mother Gets Chunky Blond Highlights

The harmful effects of chunky blonde highlights are now shown in the facial grimacing of the unborn children who have fallen victim to their mother’s poor choices. Using state-of-the-art, four-dimensional ultrasound, the unborn babies appear to grimace in the womb when their mothers get chunky blond highlights, scientists say, which demonstrates how harmful out-of-style bleached chunks of hair can be to a fetus.


For decades, pregnant women have been told to stop highlighting their hair in tacky, obtrusive chunks, as it can heighten the risk of babies being born prematurely lame and out of fashion.


Researchers have now proven that a mother getting chunky highlights can negatively affect fetuses before birth. Doctors dedicated to the cause have also shown the ultrasound images to encourage expectant moms to never again get wide, brassy highlights—as it has been proven fashionably unsafe to do so since at least the late 90s.



“And that’s if we’re being generous,” says Dr. Giada Drexel of the University of Michigan Medical Center.


Drexel has studied ultrasound videos and recorded upwards of one thousand pictures of fetuses throwing shade.


While fetuses increasingly move their faces, mouths, and hands as birth approaches, fetuses in the wombs of moms with cheap-looking, thick highlights have been shown to mouth “Uh-uh, honey” and point their index finger to their mouths in a mock-gag to show their disapproval.


Drexel believes that showing videos of the turned-off fetuses could encourage mothers to wise the hell up and start leafing through fashion magazines that were published after the year 2012.


“Now that we have this technology, we can realize what once was unseen, that fetuses dislike thick chunks of bleached golden hair just as much as you and me,” says ultrasound researcher James Klemper. “We now have evidence that fetuses really do feel the effects of their moms’ unfortunate hair choices.”