How to Deal With Insomnia While Your Boyfriend Sleeps the Effortless Sleep of the Unoppressed Beside You

Tossing and turning, worrying a bad night’s sleep will negatively effect the next day, running through the same thoughts over and over — whatever your experience, insomnia can be a tough battle. And it can be especially difficult when your boyfriend is next to you in bed, sleeping with the ease of a milk-drunk, unburdened baby who has never laid eyes upon the dark side of oppression. If this experience sounds familiar to you, try these tips for dealing with insomnia while your boyfriend sleeps the effortless sleep of the unoppressed beside you.


Don’t eat or drink right before bed.

Eating and drinking right before bed will engage your digestive system, making it harder to fall asleep. Never mind the fact that your boyfriend ate your dinner leftovers, half a family-size bag of potato chips, and drank two beers before hopping under the covers and falling immediately into a blissful and deep slumber, free from the crushing weight of the world. Burdened woman, that is simply not your path.



Make sure your environment is conducive to sleep.

It’s vital that your room feels like a peaceful and comfortable place to sleep in at night. Try to seek comfort from the deep inhales and exhales of your boyfriend who fell asleep with all the lights on while you were brushing your teeth. Try to be a bit more like him, maybe? He was in REM the second his eyelids closed and is probably dreaming about running through a field.


Minimize stress.

It’s super important to not feel stressed while you’re trying to fall asleep. Don’t start thinking about that scary joke your coworker made about assault allegations and how you want to tell someone but don’t know how because everyone likes him. It might be nice to get out of your head and talk through these problems, but not with your boyfriend because he is zonked. Don’t even look at him; he is gone from the prison of this day!


Ultimately, overthinking how to combat your insomnia will only make your insomnia worse. Try to turn off your brain and make it full of nothing like your big sleepy boyfriend who has seemingly never worried about anything. Sweet dreams!