This Asshole Doctor Says Exercise Will Help Treat Depression

Exercise can help treat clinical depression according to Dr. Martin Andrews, a professor of psychiatry at the University of Texas Southwestern Medical Center, and also a total dick.


The idea of using exercise to boost one’s mood occurred to this jerk when he noticed that several of his patients remained depressed, even with antidepressants and therapy.


“Something as simple as 20-minute jog can make a big difference in your mood,” says the idiot Dr. Andrews. Certainly the possibility seemed worth investigating to a sick fuck like him.


This asswipe conducted studies, testing exercise as a treatment for depression and found that in many cases, exercise can help keep depression symptoms at bay…you know, something that a real douche would tell you.


“A modest exercise program is an effective, robust treatment for patients with major depression,” says this fucking know-it-all asshole.


However it works, Andrews explains, the concept that exercise gives us an emotional lift makes sense evolutionarily.


“To survive as a species, we needed to run to avoid danger and hunt food. Nature obligingly found ways to make this strenuous movement pleasurable by providing us with a ‘runner’s high,’” Andrews continues, acting like a real know-it-all.


The psychiatrist, who can take a long walk off a short fucking pier, argues that those struggling with depression would do well to up their exercise routine.



He’s even taking things a step further, joining a growing movement of other shitheads who think exercise should be classified and studied as a formal medicine. These dickheads believe patients should even be given prescriptions for daily walks, runs or bike rides, just as if they were pills.


Andrews suggests that people with depression talk to their doctors about integrating workouts into their treatment.


“Side effects are almost nonexistent,” he said smiling, like a real son-of-a-bitch.


“Plus,” he pointed out, like a fuckwad, “as far as medicines go, a run in the park is relatively cheap.”