The Reductress Guide to The Women’s March

If the Women’s March on Washington is your first foray into the world of protesting, fear not! Although many sites have already compiled their ultimate guides to the march, we’ve compiled a list of the most helpful things to bring with you on the big day. From a terrarium full of ants to diamonds, here are 29 essentials you need to prepare for a weekend spent rallying in D.C.!

FIJI Water: Never show up anywhere without name brand water.
Dog Whistle: For the ability to summon any nearby dogs.
My Sister’s Keeper, by Jodi Picoult: Just some light reading!
Laser Pointer: In a sea of people, this will help you point at what you want.
A pair of Ray-Bans: To protect against the sun but mostly to frame your face.
First Aid Kit: You might scrape your knee while marching!!
Flare Gun: You might get lost at sea while marching!!
TomTom GPS: This will help you navigate your girl van through all that girl traffic.
House Keys: But swallow them first!
Two Pairs of Socks: One for your feet, the other for your hands in case you forgot gloves.
Adderall: For if you have ADHD.
A bottle of Purell: So you all don’t sync up.

A Piece of Paper With Your Name On it: So you don’t have to bring your ID.
Diamonds: So you can trade for stuff, like coffee, or more precious stones.
Friends: Duh!
One girl you don’t like as much: Somebody has to hold everyone’s bags!!
A poncho: In case you really don’t want to make friends.
Orange Juice: For vitamin C we guess??
A Walkman: So you can listen to music like it’s 1992 again.
Tea bags: Just to suck on!
Desktop Computer: So you can still work while leaving your laptop at home.
Terrarium of Ants: For something pretty to look at!!
5-Lb Weights: Get those reps in while walking!
An Expensive Pashmina: Anywhere from $100 to $200 will suffice.
Plastic bags: To keep even more plastic bags inside.
Lipgloss: Protect your lips while looking cute while protesting the unjust nature of our democracy!
Coke and Mentos: Just in case you need to prove science is real!
Violin: But only if you can really play!
Post-Its: They’re like tiny signs and are much easier to carry!

We hope this helpful guide keeps you safe and comfortable during the March. Please stay safe and have a GREAT time!