As of this Monday, experts have confirmed that Jesus fucking Christ this is bad.
“At this point in time we can confidently say that things are fucked now, will be fucked in the future, and were also fucked in the past,” says Dr. Cleo Watson. “It’s all very ‘AH’, you know?”
“When you take into account those battling against death or the death of a loved one, severe financial insecurity, immunocompromised people incarcerated in life-threatening conditions, and countless other tragedies taking place simultaneously,” Dr. Watson adds. “You really begin to wonder, what the shit?”
Most agree that a disaster of this scale makes one question what aspect of human nature has made the world such an absolutely fucking dreadful place: A quandary that has plagued many of history’s Great Thinkers — most of whom were bad, too!
“Oh fuck,” said one source close to the story.
Witnesses attest that fuck shit Lord Jesus.
“Can this get any worse? It looks like the answer is absolutely yes, in ways that will shock and surprise us all,” says Dr. Watson. “Will it get better? Hard to say, but in a meaningful way, no.”
Recent projections predict that wow, wow, wow, wow. Really awful stuff.
No one is safe but also some people are basically safe because the premise of the world is inequality.
In the meantime, good fucking God.
