With so many alternatives to having children and a feeble social system cracking underneath us, it can be challenging to know whether you really want to bring kids into the world or not and if it’s for the right reasons. If you find yourself with a retirement plan that looks something like “Get hit by a car someday??” take this quiz to find out if you really want children or if you just want a younger, stronger person to take care of you in your final days:
When you see someone with a baby, you…
- Get a funny feeling in your stomach, like butterflies, that makes you just want to nurture a tiny, defenseless human.
- See the great potential in this human vessel to make you soup in your sunset years.
If you had to choose how many kids to have, you’d answer…
- It depends! I have enough room in my heart for many children, but I want to make sure I can provide a life for them that they deserve.
- It depends! How many standard American salaries will it take to support one elderly person with no insurance in the year 2077?
Do you even like kids?
- They serve a purpose.
Do you have savings and a steady job to support a child?
- I have a little bit of savings and a good job with insurance, so I think I’m ready to take on a new challenge.
- Not exactly, but I’m hoping the child might.
Where do you see yourself in 20 years?
- Probably seeing my first child off to college, and thinking about retirement.
- Probably asking my first child for rent money, and thinking about selling essential oils.
Mostly 1’s: You want children! Aww! Having children seems to be in the cards for you, as you genuinely want to raise a human being to love and nurture. You seem to have a good understanding of what it takes to have a child, and we hope you embark on this exciting adventure!
Mostly 2’s: You want an end-of-life plan. It seems like that feeling in your gut isn’t the innate desire to have children, but rather the fear of death that plagues us all, as you grasp at straws for anything that might help you maintain some dignity before you are unceremoniously thrown into the pauper’s grave. Maybe you should invest in yourself first while you still can?