Hey, Beth. It’s your girl, Ilana. Depression has ways of sneaking up on us, so find out where your mood stands with this quick quiz, Beth! We’re worried about you!
1. I don’t enjoy the things I used to, like getting drunk with mah girl, Ilana.
a. Agree strongly
b. Agree
c. Disagree
d. Disagree strongly
2. I feel unhappy at my job, because Brian is an asshole.
a. Agree strongly
b. Agree
c. Disagree
d. Disagree strongly
3. I don’t like how I look, and Dad called my undercut a “mistake.”
a. Agree strongly
b. Agree
c. Disagree
d. Disagree strongly
4. I think men aren’t attracted to me, specifically Dustin, which is fine because he’s wrong for me, but not fine because he led me on.
a. Agree strongly
b. Agree
c. Disagree
d. Disagree strongly
5. I spend a lot of time to myself, reading blogs about plot holes in Game of Thrones.
a. Agree strongly
b. Agree
c. Disagree
d. Disagree strongly
6. I can’t get out of bed to return those ugly earrings, and I’M REACHING THE 30-DAY DEADLINE.
a. Agree strongly
b. Agree
c. Disagree
d. Disagree strongly
7. I’m uncomfortable in my own skin, which I call “Shitty Beth Skin.”
a. Agree strongly
b. Agree
c. Disagree
d. Disagree strongly
8. I am workshopping a one-woman show.
a. Agree strongly
b. Agree
c. Disagree
d. Disagree strongly
9. I consider Reddit “workshopping.”
a. Agree strongly
b. Agree
c. Disagree
d. Disagree strongly
10. I’m thinking of going by, “Liz,” in any effort to reclaim a personal identity.
a. Agree strongly
b. Agree
c. Disagree
d. Disagree strongly
Results:
If you answered mostly As, then you’re not okay, Beth! Let’s hang soon!
If you answered mostly Bs, then let’s do a phone chat soon, Beth!
If you answered mostly Cs, then you can totally come to my housewarming party, Beth!
If you answered mostly Ds, then you’re fine, Beth, and lets get dranks!! xoxo, Ilana
