‘I’m Proud Of My Cellulite!’ Is What I’d Say If I Had Any Cellulite

For too long, we women have bent over backward to appear perfect. We’ve cringed at the sight of our stretch marks, pimples, and muffin tops. No more! Don’t let anyone tell you what to do or how to feel about yourself! I don’t. I’m even proud of my cellulite! Or, I would be, if I had any. My thighs are perfectly firm, as if they were carved out of marble. But even if they weren’t, I would love them.


We women shouldn’t have to live up to anyone’s unrealistic beauty expectations. I can’t always be bothered to put on makeup. I may look like I’m wearing makeup because I have poreless skin and thick, jet-black eyelashes, but I haven’t even spent five minutes on my face. So I feel you, sister! I’d be proud of those dark circles if I were you!


Just because we have imperfections doesn’t mean we should have to hide our bodies. I flaunt my imperfections! Well, to clarify, I plan to flaunt them if I ever get any. I can’t believe I got through four pregnancies and without even one stretch mark! My doctor called it “a miracle of genetics.” It’s disheartening, honestly, to know that when people look at me, they think “sexy lady” and not “that’s a woman who’s created life.” Unfortunately, my pert breasts and scar-free belly disguise the depth of my life experience. An experience I would be very proud to show to the world, were there any physical evidence of it on my body.



When I retired from modeling, I was so excited. Finally, I was going to be able to eat whatever I wanted and relax my exercise schedule. I figured once I popped out some kids, I’d finally have the chance to be a normal lady, not the “ideal woman” I’d always been. You can imagine my surprise when I discovered that I could still eat whatever I wanted to and not gain an ounce of weight! I ate and ate, and…nothing! I also never got the wrinkles I was so prepared to embrace. It’s kind of embarrassing it is to be constantly mistaken for my teenage daughter’s sister, but even if I looked like the old mom I am, I’d be like, “Hey, deal with it people.”


So the next time that you catch sight of yourself in the mirror and see the bags under your eyes or your small weird tits, don’t beat yourself up. Think, “I love my non-waist” or “I’ve earned the right to rock my sack of potatoes rump.” Because you deserve to be proud of your body, exactly as it is. That’s what I’m doing!