Today, the unthinkable finally happened. I haven’t done laundry in almost two weeks, which means that the two pairs of underwear I actually like are dirty, while the rest of my underwear drawer is comprised of pairs I don’t really like as much.
How could this happen to me?
Nothing compares to my favorite two pairs of underwear — they’re seamless, stretchy, cotton, and they even have cute little bows on the front. The rest of my underwear is either distractingly uncomfortable lingerie, or too comfortable value pack underwear that are also really ugly.
How’s a girl like me supposed to win in this tragic situation?
I finally mustered up the courage to put on my best option at the time: a pair of Fruit of the Loom high waisted undies that were two sizes too big for me. Sure, they felt great, but they were nowhere near the same level of perfection as my actually aesthetically pleasing underwear.
No one should ever have to go through this!
Throughout my day at the office, all I could think about were the cute pairs of underwear trapped in the prison of my laundry hamper. It just wasn’t fair! If I could, I would have my entire underwear drawer filled with that exact brand and design of bikini cut panties, but my favorite pair is coincidentally my most expensive, so this is unfortunately out of the question.
Why, God? Why?!
I have gone through this harrowing experience so many times in my life after forgetting to do my laundry for an extended period of time, and yet it somehow always hurts more than the last. This cyclical, unforgiving pain is why I have finally decided to be rid of this sacrifice altogether and go totally commando tomorrow.
If I can’t have my favorite pair, then I refuse to wear anything at all, and this may or may not be because I don’t really want to do my laundry tomorrow either.
