‘I Just Don’t Like to Take Ibuprofen,’ Says Woman Who Loves Headaches

31-year-old Janie Wheeler is devoutly anti-ibuprofen, only keeping it around in case of a severe injury.

 

Janie, who absolutely loves headaches, “just doesn’t like taking the stuff”.

 

“Taking ibuprofen is taxing on your liver,” says Janie, who lies in wait, excited for the next weather-related migraine to finally hit her. “I just don’t want to take it if I don’t absolutely have to.”

 

Janie, who smiles at the thought of a tension headache, thinks people rely on pills far too much.

 

“A headache is usually a sign that I need to drink more water, or get some sleep,” says Janie, who is clearly looking for an excuse to just kind of languish in bed. “I’d rather listen to my body first before I take pills to fix a problem.”

 

Janie’s friends are struggling to understand why she chooses to needlessly suffer when the bottle of Advil is like, right there.

 

 

“She’ll always mention when she feels like she has a headache coming on,” says coworker Shayna Watkins. “But she always sounds so weirdly confident when we offer her some Advil and she passes it up. This girl is literally obsessed with headaches.”

 

“Last week I had a headache that took me out for three whole days,” Janie said, with a wistful tone of someone who just loves whatever those headaches are giving her. “I almost went to the emergency room.”

 

Later that night, Janie shared that she had avoided peeing after a date with her new boyfriend because she just loves the UTIs.