In a classic case of people throwing stones from glass houses, 30-year-old personal injury lawyer Mia Wright told her friend she “hates Disney Adults” even though she, herself, is a Money Adult.
The incident began when Mia showed her friend, Rachel Simmons, a video of two adults losing their minds while meeting Goofy at Disney World, which was, admittedly, an odd thing to post online.
Rather than critiquing this better point, Mia instead said, “God, I just don’t understand Disney Adults. There’s more to life than just Disney!” which is rich coming from someone who singularly pursues money.
“I know, it’s like, people should have a wide breadth of hobbies,” Rachel added, clearly forgetting that she had quit each of her childhood passions to make more room for money-making activities like work, her side-hustles, and a mildly successful dropshipping business. “Try something new! Go outside!”
Sources confirm neither Rachel nor Mia have gone outside for more than 15 minutes in about 10 months, as they’re pretty reliably strapped to their desks.
“I just don’t get why they’re so obsessed with one thing,” Mia continued, even though she has spent every waking moment since her teens desperately trying to find ways to earn more and more cash, which is strange considering she’s stable as-is. “Find another reason to get up in the morning!”
Rachel and Mia then laughed heartily at this, as if either of them have felt significant joy since high school that was not fueled by external validation from their jobs.
“I mean, sure, if that’s what makes you happy, fine,” Mia qualified, realizing that she was kind of being mean. “It’s just kind of a silly thing to bring you so much joy. Can’t they see it’s corporate? It isn’t real!”
This statement comes from someone whose sole source of joy for the past several years has been moving incrementally upward in her exploitative work environment, all with the hopes of someday reaching the top.
“What’s the end game here? They just keep going back and back and back to Disney until they’ve had enough?” Rachel added, yet again seemingly unaware that she was describing her exact relationship to money. “Don’t they realize that will never happen? They’ll never be satisfied!”
As of press time, both Rachel and Mia had sighed in pity, then cut their lunch break short to return to work.
