How to Receive a Nude Without Asking If They’ve Gotten That Mole Checked Out

Receiving a dick pic from your slampiece can be a trying circumstance under any conditions. You want to respond in a way that’s affirming, but it can be difficult when you suddenly spot a raised mole on their shaft that you’ve never registered in any previous encounter. Here’s how to resist the gnawing urge to bring it up.


Get the zooming out of your system.

When you receive a photo of genitals with a concerning mole on them, your foremost instinct will be to use the great advances in cellular phone cameras to zoom in on the nevus as much as technologically possible. And so you should! Zoom, zoom, and zoom some more until you are transfixed and held emotionally hostage by this abstract, fleshy topographic nightmare. If the nude sender knew their X-rated pic was going to be analyzed with such grave detachment, they would probably never photograph their body again, but that’s not your problem (though their potential melanoma may be).


Make up a story about someone who died from skin cancer, then smooth things over with a steamy sext.

This maneuver isn’t easy to pull off, but it will be worth it in the end. First, tell them how you were just randomly reminded of an old ping pong instructor you had (the more details the better!) who had a strange mole that he never got checked out and then he died. Say, “It’s just such a shame, because if he had only gotten that mole checked out, he’d probably still be with us, and I might be incredibly good at ping pong”. Then quickly add a follow up about how you’re dying to have his cock in your mouth or whatever. This tactic employs the power of suggestion without you ever having to come right out and unsexily voice your unconcern.



Biopsy it yourself.

Calling attention to the mole will only make your lover self-conscious and kill the mood, so instead reply to the nude saying that it made you so bonkers horny that you need to come over and do sex things immediately. Do some quick googling and a supply pick-up on your way over to their pad, then say you want to do medical roleplay, and just biopsy that sucker yourself! This is the safest and most effective option for everyone’s health, mental and physical. It’s also…kinda hot?


Never get derailed by a mysteriously shaped mole near a hole again with these surefire approaches to kosher nude reception. And next time you fuck, make sure you do it with medical-grade fluorescent lighting so you can nip any concerns in the bud!