How to Feel Sexy When You Are Not

Sometimes it’s hard to feel sexy, especially when you’re not. Sexiness is all about confidence and your mindset, so feeling sexy is sexy! But in many cases, this requires you to spin a web of lies and self-delusion in order to maintain a semblance of self-confidence while existing in the world. So, here’s how to do that!


Imagine you are someone else.

We all know that roleplaying with a partner can spice things up in a relationship, but it can also spice things up in your relationship to yourself! If you’re standing at the bar having a hard time feeling seductive because you forgot to brush your teeth this morning and have a layer of plaque that you can feel with your tongue, then simply dissociate from your corporeal form and pretend you are Geena Davis at any time in her life or career. This is like VR, but only in your mind!



Redefine what it means to be sexy.

So maybe you aren’t sexy, but that’s only because you’re working within an outdated framework of what sexiness is! Maybe being sexy is actually all about feeling exhausted, wearing yesterday’s underwear inside out, and having a bit of a head cold. Once you instill this new rubric, you’ll suddenly be the sexist person at the function. The rest of society might be slower to catch on, but at least you’re on the right track.


Let the art of song be a balm.

Art is so powerful for its ability to make us identify with experiences outside of our own. This can often be used to foster empathy, but more importantly, it can be used to make your nasty ass feel sexy. Listen to Megan Thee Stallion, watch a mid-2000s Ciara music video, watch a Lana Del Ray music video, if you have to! We don’t judge! Then allow yourself to slip into the sensual mindset of these divas even though you have a yogurt stain on not one but two garments of clothing you’re currently wearing.


We all deserve to feel sexy, but from a strictly statistical standpoint, we’re not. But stop letting reality get in the way and take matters into your own hands with these foolproof tips that will have you feeling alluring as fuck even though you look like a movie character who just went through a bad breakup despite this just being a normal day for you. Rock on, sexpot!