How I Learned to Love My Body, Even Though I’m the Second Body in a Human Centipede

Society has so many standards when it comes to “beauty” – perfect skin, shiny hair, a functioning mouth, and anus. It’s just so hard to accept your flaws, especially when magazines and commercials only show people that aren’t sewn to other people. For a while, these societal pressures really affected my self-esteem. But, after years of looking in a mirror around Kelsey, the first person in the centipede, I’ve decided to stop caring about what others think. Yes, I’m the second person in a human centipede, but I want the world to know that I am beautiful too, and in my heart, I’m really number one.


I’ll admit, I don’t have that perfect “look.” For example, I have curly hair while waves seem to be really in. I’m not a size 0 like many supermodels. Also, I can’t stand up straight and I no longer have a tongue. But the older I get, the more I realize that these differences are what make me unique. Sure, it’s hard when you don’t see yourself portrayed in the media, but I’m confident that it will only be a matter of time before another human centipede graces the cover of Vogue or drags themself down the runway at New York Fashion Week. Hell, maybe it could be me, that is if my master ever lets me leave the basement/dungeon!



Of course, there are days when I don’t feel pretty. For example, Eddie, the third, sometimes mumbles that my bowel movements are unpleasant. And Kelsey is always saying mean things about me, but mostly because she’s the only one who can talk. However, I try to look at all the positives. For example, I used to be really self-conscious about my teeth because they were a little crooked and weren’t perfectly bleach white. But now I don’t have teeth, and honestly, it’s so freeing to not have to worry about them! Also, I can’t wear any clothes, which makes getting ready in the morning super easy. Plus, I would be saving a huge amount of money on new clothes, assuming I still had access to my personal finances.


These days, I try to focus on other things besides my looks. I’m a strong, semi-independent woman, and I don’t need anyone besides Kelsey and Eddie to tell me where to go! I’m smart, I’m caring, and in my free time I’m earning my master’s degree in International Macroeconomics online from Georgetown University (I’m the first centipede – human or nonhuman – they ever accepted!). There is more to me than what my fellow centipedes and I look like on the outside. I have so much on the inside, as Eddie would attest to.


My future is as bright as the one window in our basement. I encourage anyone who is reading this to stop judging themself based on their looks. I instead encourage you to be the confident person you are on the inside. Also, I encourage you to please call the police and report my location.