In a confusing story emerging from Phoenix, AZ, 27-year-old self-proclaimed “tell it like it is”-type of guy Pierson Miller has no problem saying every slur under the sun, but has drawn a hard line at being called “weird.”
“It’s just such a rude and callous thing to say about someone,” Pierson told reporters from the deck of his frat house, where he was flicking cigarette butts at unsuspecting passersby. “I thought we were entering an era of politics where people were civilized? Now Democrats are calling Republican candidates ‘weird’ – what happened to respect?”
Pierson went on to admit he’s said the N-word, C-word, B-word, and a bunch of other “words” that reporters could not readily identify and were honestly afraid to ask about. He seemed to have an encyclopedic knowledge of slurs matched only by his eagerness to share this encyclopedic knowledge of slurs.
“But when I’m saying a slur, it’s because I think it’s no big deal,” he continued in his own defense, even though that did not sound like a defense at all. “In contrast, calling someone ‘weird’ is mean. I would know, because I called dozens of losers ‘weird’ in high school, and it really seemed to get under their skin.”
Pierson then made the extremely offensive comparison that “calling Republicans ‘weird’ is like calling someone the N-word,” which is especially ironic considering he has definitely done that.
“Anyway, I think it’s just childish what the Democrats are doing,” he continued, unphased by the fact that one of his cigarette butts had lit a patch of grass on fire. “Why stoop so low? Why don’t the Dems stick to campaigning for their platform instead of making personal attacks, huh?”
When asked to comment on Trump’s platform, Pierson responded, “He’s more of a vibes guy.”
At this point in the conversation, Pierson – unprompted – called Kamala Harris a “bitch,” referred to his girlfriend as a “crazy cunt,” and called Impossible Meat a “brand for cucks and virgins.”
“Everyone has a line that they don’t think should be crossed,” he continued, returning to the matter at hand while also commenting “not funny” on a woman’s TikTok without watching it. “For me, that line is disrespect. Calling me and people like me ‘weird’ is disrespectful. Plain as that.”
As of press time, Pierson was seen pacing his room, struggling to find a slur to call Harris’ VP pick, Tim Walz. While he has not yet landed on one, reporters are confident he’ll get creative with it.
