Fun Family Fitness Routines to Endanger Your Baby

Being a good parent means keeping your family happy and healthy, but it can be challenging to find the time and energy to exercise when you’ve got a bundle of joy to care for. Luckily, your baby is actually the perfect opportunity to stay in shape as a family while seriously endangering her wellbeing. Here are some cool exercises to do with your baby that will keep your body tight and your social media audience thinking, “…Are you sure that’s really a good idea?”

 

Use your baby as a weight!

Even though your baby is very heavy, carrying it for nine months didn’t seem to make you any skinnier. What a drag! But now that it’s out of your belly and in your hands, you can do whatever you want with it! So push it to the sky or gently swing it back and forth, because a fearful, screaming baby is the ultimate resistance training. These moves are guaranteed to keep your baby weight off and keep your baby useful as you really push yourself to the limit. Your friends will say, “Wow, you’re really strong but have you ever heard of shaken baby syndrome?”

 

Hop over your baby!

Good fitness is about pushing your body to overcome obstacles, and what better obstacle is there than your baby? Put it on the floor and do all your normal aerobic moves, making sure you just barely avoid stepping on it. Hopping over your baby is a great way to keep all your fitness goals on track, in spite of having to nurture and protect the life you’ve created. Remember, when people say “stay active” they mean constantly and at any cost!

 

 

BURPees!

Burpees are hard to do on your own, let alone while trying to prove to the world that you’re a better, hotter mom than they are. So get ready for a serious challenge with BURPees! Using one of those baby-swaddling blankets, secure the baby to your torso, making sure it can breathe or whatever. Next, begin your burpees, making sure to actually burp your child in between sets. This is a great move to work every muscle in your body while showing off your multi-tasking skills. You’re a mom, which means you can do literally everything all at once, including keeping that baby just on the edge of danger.

 

Bring your baby to Crossfit!

So you’ve already replaced all of your baby’s bouncy balls with medicine balls, but now it’s time to take things to the next level. Bring your baby to Crossfit and let her play! If she’s not ready for the freeweights, put her on a treadmill—a move so innovative that no one has ever tried it or even studied the positive effects it might probably have on the baby. Your baby will be on its way to shedding that baby fat before anyone can even say, “You’re not fit to be a mother.”

 

All these moves are perfect for a #fitmom who is ready to show the world that she can look really hot and have a baby! But make sure your iPhone is recording, otherwise it doesn’t count as exercise and you have to do it all over again.