So you took the plunge and got that pixie cut that looked really cute on Anne Hathaway, but now that you’re looking at yourself in the mirror you’re crying over loosing your long, beachy waves. You know hair grows back, but you don’t have time to wait for that, so it’s time to ask your hairdresser to sweep that hair into a Ziploc, grab a glue stick, and glue that hair back on your head. This is the only way to fix your problem!
Spread out what used to be six-inches luxurious layers across the crown of your head, then fuse them to the side of your head with upward motions. Your head will be sprouting glorious long locks in no time! It might not look as natural as what you had before, but at least you won’t feel like you wasted money on balayage and then a haircut you don’t like on top of it!
The Curled Whimsy
Come on, your life isn’t over—just grab a glue gun and a curling iron and get to styling! The tighter you make your curls, the easier it will be to hide the clear patches of dried on hot glue that’s holding your shit together. The scalp pain is nothing compared to the pain of not having your long hair!
The Faux Faux-Hawk
So you were planning to donate your hair to Locks of Love, but after seeing how weird you feel your ears look, you’ve suddenly changed your mind. Grab one of the braids that you intended to give to charity and simply paste it to the top of your head in a fierce fake faux-hawk kind of thing. Worth a try, right?
The Princess Leia
Undercuts are harder to grow out than bangs, so skip the six months of waiting by keeping your hair glued over your temples and ears while you wait for your hair to return to normal. Skip the wait by just gluing the fucking thing back on. You wanted edgy, but not that edgy!
Who says you have to glue your hair back on in a pattern? Make it kind of random so people think, “Oh! She’s a girl who’s a ton of fun!” and not, “Uh… what’s going on with her head?” You’re unpredictable, but not a mess–even though the shock of going from long to short made you cry. That kind of thing should be done in increments, not all at once! Why didn’t your stylist warn you??
No glue in the world is going to put your hair back to what it was, but it’s worth a try. Next time you feel like you need a change, just keep the glue gun ready!