The air is getting cooler, the days are getting shorter, and your hair is looking basic. It’s time to pack away the shorts, bikinis, and sunny disposition and do something new with your hair for the fall season. Should you dye it a new color? Should you get bangs, or go ombré, or finally try the Karlie Kloss long bob? No. You should not do any of those things. Instead, shave a conspicuous amount of hair from somewhere on your head and just leave the rest of it as-is. This is what people are doing now, and so should you. Is getting streaks of a wild color enough? No it is not. Can you just cut your hair short instead? Nope, sorry. The only way you can be on trend this fall is to get sort of drunk and grab an electric razor and take a random swipe at some area of your head. Let the hair fall where it may.
If you’re at a loss for what part of your head to shave, here are some suggestions:
- Above your ear on the left side.
- Above your ear on the right side.
- Above your ears on both sides.
- All the way around the base of your hairline.
- Each side of your head (Mohawk)
- Straight down the middle (reverse Mohawk)
- Small square on the top left of your head (possible head injury)
- Long wandering strip from right temple to left nape (“Did she have surgery?”)
Still not sure if shaving some or all of your hair is right for you? Here are some FAQs.
Q: Are you sure that shaving off a chunk of my hair is the right move for me?
A: Yes.
Q: What if I don’t like my hair partially or totally shaved?
A: Hair grows back. You’ll be fine.
Q: But what if I don’t want to wait for my hair to grow back? Doesn’t that take a long time?
A: Wear a hat. Hats are great.
Q: But I look weird in hats. My head looks like a Q-Tip.
A: Wear a flowery headband and wait it out.
Q: How can you wear a headband if you don’t have any hair? What’s it for, then?
A: Look, babies do it all the time. Just trust us.
Q: Can I wear a wig if I don’t like it shaved?
A: Sure, if you want to be a liar.
Q: What if my romantic partner doesn’t like it?
A: Thank them for letting you know that they’re a style moron, then dump them. Don’t you want to look hip for fall?
You’ll love the feeling of freedom that comes from a partially or totally shaved head, even if you don’t totally love the way it looks or feels and no one else does, either! The important part is to look different because it’s colder out. Good luck!
