56-year-old Debbie Henderson adopted a three-strike policy to her relationship and raising children, but has liberally applied the policy to all other aspects of her life ever since.
Debbie’s three-strike policy began when her former boyfriend had failed her twice. When he finally proposed to her, she proudly responded: “Strike three. You’re out!” And never saw him again.
Since this incident nearly thirty years ago, Debbie has staunchly applied her three-strike worldview to all aspects of her life. In her first month at a job in an accounting office, her name was misspelled on a staff directory. Although it was readily corrected, the lack of apology (strike two) caused Debbie to dangle at two strikes for some time. Ultimately, the third and final strike came 11 years into her tenure, when Debbie was offered a huge promotion with a raise to match. When Debbie requested a personal assistant and was rebuffed, righteously not only turned down the promotion on the spot, she quit her job entirely.
After months of unemployment, Debbie began watching children of friends and family, people who were at that time, and are all no longer, part of her life. These children did not respect Debbie’s three-strike policy, which caused her to cut out each and every one of them out of her life in record three-strike time. And when Debbie Henderson says “three strikes,” that’s it.
“It’s unorthodox,” says third husband, Jake. “But I respect her more for it. I’m already at two strikes; if I fuck this one up, she’s done with marriage altogether.”
Debbie Henderson may no longer have a job, friends, or even mail delivered to her house anymore since that third time in 25 years her neighbor’s mail was mistakenly delivered to her address and she cut off her relationship with the Postal Service altogether. But, what remains of her fractured family can agree: “She has a principle.”