In an aspirational story coming out of Minneapolis, MN, 24-year-old Nora Hess got a boyfriend solely so she wouldn’t have to look both ways when crossing the street.
Love is real!
“I’ve always wanted a relationship where I could let my guard down,” Nora told reporters. “My dream came true when I met Daniel, and I no longer had to look before crossing the street. I just walk when he walks, no thoughts, mind blank. It has honestly been super healing.”
According to reports, Nora has also started to let her guard down in other facets of her life beyond just crossing the street.
“A true partnership is built entirely upon trust – which is why I trust Daniel to remember to pay our bills every month, set the alarm to wake us up in the morning, set the eight backup alarms to wake us up after I inevitably snooze the first one, make sure we always get to the airport on time, among a million other things. That’s just the kind of partner I am.”
Some of Nora’s friends have expressed misgivings about her new relationship after noticing the change in her behavior.
“I just don’t think she needs to let her guard all the way down,” Nora’s friend Davis said. “There’s nothing wrong with continuing to wear a helmet while biking, or still driving on the correct side of the road, or maintaining some caution around wild animals. I don’t care how safe she feels with him – if Daniel wasn’t able to fend off an attack from my house cat Henry, he’s not protecting anyone from a grizzly bear.”
Still, Nora maintained that having complete trust in your partner – even when it feels unnatural to do so – is essential to a healthy relationship.
“I understand it can be scary to be vulnerable,” she told reporters. “Whether it be emotionally vulnerable, vulnerable to getting squashed in the middle of a busy intersection, or vulnerable to an unprovoked grizzly bear attack – it never stops being frightening to put your complete trust in another person.”
“Do I look both ways when I cross the street? No! Is that a massive safety hazard? Absolutely! But that’s what relationships are all about – taking that giant leap into the unknown and having faith that everything will be okay and that you won’t get obliterated by a Megabus.”
Who said romance was dead?