This year just keeps getting weirder and wilder! As if the current political landscape wasn’t crazy enough, we just got word that Danielle, a 26-year-old marketing manager, bought a beer, spilled it all over herself, then pursued normal conversation as if nothing had happened.
Yep, you read that right: Danielle is a smooth genius. We’ve never seen such a commitment to avoiding awkwardness before!
“She made a massive mess,” witness Georgie Kahn says. “The beer went everywhere. But Danielle just kept talking as if nothing was wrong. Her shoes were absolutely destroyed.”
How can a grown woman completely ignore the mess she’s made? Where does she find inspiration to let a watermelon summer ale seep through her jeans without acknowledgement? The answer might be simpler than you think.
“I was embarrassed and didn’t want to try attention to it,” Danielle explains. “I decided to ignore it really hard.”
Witnesses says that fifteen seconds after purchasing her drink, Danielle spilled it all over herself, “like a toddler developing her small motor skills.” But she wasn’t affected or embarrassed; Danielle just continued her conversation without making a big “thing” about it and ordered another drink.
As her friends asked, “Danielle, whoa, are you okay?” Danielle simply responded with a frantic smile, “What are you talking about? I’m fine!”
“Danielle essentially lit $7 on fire, then sat in beer-soaked underwear all night to avoid admitting she had dropped her drink,” boyfriend Kyle Ernsky says.
Danielle could’ve done what most of us normal girls would’ve done—apologized profusely, grabbed a fistful of cocktail napkins from the bar, and completely decimate the chill summertime vibes you friends had cultivated. But then there’s the other way, and that’s where Danielle went. Wow. We’re still reeling from this game-changing move!
If you’ve got the guts or the IQ, try Danielle’s signature move next time you do something dumb: completely ignore it and move on like nothing happened!