Updating your “#VacayGoals” Pinterest board? Well, you might want to make it private, cause you need to hit these places before your sister gets to them first. One thing to consider when planning your trip of a lifetime is that your more likeable and better storyteller of a sister may be ready to snatch your itinerary from right under you! Why wouldn’t she? She named her new Lhasa Apso Chloe as if she had NO recollection of your confiding to her, under a blanket fort during the Blizzard of ‘96, that your firstborn daughter would be named Chloe!!
Get dibs on those photo “Likes” before your sister does with these must-see locations that will take your breath (and the opportunity for your sister to one-up you) away!
1. South Africa
Are you ready for exhilarating safaris, world-renowned surfing, and enviably charming accents? Most importantly, are you ready to be the most interesting member of your family at the next family wedding? If you spend just ten days doing basic tourist activities in Johannesburg and the surrounding areas, your showoff sister won’t be able to compete for years. She never let you touch the family cat—don’t let her be the first one to pet an elephant!
2. Eiffel Tower
Une, deux, trois…cent! As the elevator rises, taking you up France’s most iconic structure overlooking the striking Parisian skyline, so, too, will the “Like” count rise of your Facebook check-in at the world’s most visited monument. This bucket list destination will leave you with memories that will last a lifetime and your sister in a state of “Je ne sais pas” when it comes to her ability to comment on French travel. Serves her right.
3. Leaning Tower of Pisa
While you may not have been the first child in the family to graduate college (that honor going instead to your sister), you can still be the first one in the family to take the cliché picture of yourself holding up the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Your mom will say to her friends, “That’s my globe-trotting daughter! Look how funny and adventurous she is!” Even if your sister decides to visit the tower and post a similar picture, her Facebook comments will just say, “Oh look! You copied your sister!” The wound in her soul will be great.
4. Taj Mahal
As you gaze at this wonder of world, built as act of love as pure, white and pristine as the grounds it stands, you’ll visualize yourself flooding your families’ newsfeed with your own photos of this world wonder. Your family will have heard so much about “The Taj” (as you’ll offhandedly refer to it) that by the time your sister gets the time and money to go, the family will reply to her stories with, “Oh right! Your sister told us that too!” After all the times she posted unflattering #TBTs of you as a tween, she deserves this.
5. The Moon
With its airless, dusty, rocky charm, the “big cheese” is the perfect destination to see before your a-hole sister. Going into massive debt to sign up for Virgin Galactic’s future moon flight will show everyone that when it comes to your family, you are America and your sister Russia. That’s what she gets for never letting you be Belle and always making you play the Beast!
Remember: The three things people can’t take away from you are education, vacation, and showing that dumbass older sister who’s boss. When it comes to global adventures, don’t take her hand-me-downs. Get out there and DIY them yourself!
