You’ve got a few hours to yourself this evening and you just want to get cozy and enjoy it. Here are our favorite cozy, luxurious robes that definitely won’t help you forget you have to head back to your mind-numbing and soul-crushing job tomorrow:
Long and Fuzzy
This style robe is a classic that puts you instantly into a land of comfort and warmth because it is impossibly soft to the touch. Unfortunately, no matter how much you graze it’s luxurious surface, you will not be able to get the nagging dread of your 9-to-5, soul-sucking, dream-crushing job out of your comfy little head.
The Too-Short Robe
Making your guests feel a little uncomfortable in your home with this sexy little number is always entertaining. But it will definitely not distract you from that nagging feeling that there’s something else you need to get done tomorrow but you can’t remember what it is and you’re going to be so so pissed when you finally remember, just as you’re trying to go to sleep tonight.
Short and Silky
This sexy, smooth number can get you in the mood for a little me-time, or even a little you-and-him-time. But it can’t erase the fact that your boss is going to say that weird passive-aggressive thing she says every single day the SECOND you get to work in the morning.
The Grandpa Robe
This one can really get you feeling nostalgic. You may want to reminisce about the good ‘ole days and remember when your parents still supported you financially. Back when you weren’t caught up in an all-consuming fantasy about jumping onto your boss’s desk, screaming “YOUR MUSTACHE IS WEIRD AND I QUIT THIS JOB” before being carried out on the shoulders of your co-workers.
Just remember, it’s important to understand the true meaning of relaxation with a high-quality robe. And it’s important to your quality of life to eventually quit your job and be able to wear that robe all day without consequences. Until then, this robe will not fix any of your problems.
