4 Brandy Melville Fashions to Desperately Stuff Your 29-Year-Old Ass Into
The Ariana Painter Pant, $38
Hop on the fall fashion train with this earth-toned pair of painter’s pants! Made out of 100% cotton with no spandex or stretch whatsoever, these pants are perfect for the figureless transition into adolescent autumn. Pair it with a crop top and a black beret, and you’ll look like a hip, artsy teen while your age-related slowed metabolism will make sure your waistline looks like a bag of pizza dough being forced out of a denim bag! Remember: You did this to yourself!
