Print Edition ARCHIVES

Aw! This Baby Will Have Her Mother’s Depression but Her Father’s Generalized Anxiety Disorder

Blow His Mind by Swallowing His Dick and Then Pulling a String of Infinite Dicks out of Your Mouth

‘Youth Is Wasted on the Young,’ Says Old Person Who Is Wasting the Old

Autopsy Confirms Bite Marks on Corpse Came From Someone With Beautiful Smile

Awkward! Woman Says Dog Is Her Best Friend, But He’s Never Said It Back

Ambulance Chaser? Woman’s Reply to Viral Tweet Going Semi-Viral

How to Get a Man to Open Up, but Not So Much That the Whole World Hates Him

Woman Prefaces Porn Search With ‘I Wouldn’t Want This in Real Life But’

Celebrity Plastic Surgery Fails That Look Almost as Bad as Your Regular Face

House of Representatives Agrees to ‘Just Do a Silly One’ for 13th Speaker Vote

Are You out of Groceries or Are You Just out of Cheese?

I Masturbated for 10,000 Hours and Malcolm Gladwell Came to My House With a Giant Check

woman with hand on male partners chest outside

How to Celebrate the Anniversary of January 6 by Risking It All for a Man Who Doesn’t Care About You

Budget Queen? This Woman Used A Teeth Whitening Strip On Her Asshole

Back to Business! This Woman Just Cut Off Her Press-On Nails

Scientists Determine Lucy Also Felt a Little Bit Nauseous All the Time

Jar Of Husband’s Ashes Impossible To Open Without Help

REPORT: Boss Baby Also Nepo Baby

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