Woman Inconvenienced by Revolution

Unlike what the history books taught her, Brooklyn resident Shelby Sawyer is discovering that revolution isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be – for her, it’s actually sort of inconvenient right now.


“I had to get to an appointment across town, and a huge protest went by for a full 20 minutes,” Shelby said. “I still made it to my appointment, but geez, that was really cumbersome to get through.”


Shelby, who is in support of Black Lives Matter, just wishes that this upheaval in white supremacy wouldn’t result in such an upheaval in her precious little day.


“I mean, what if an emergency vehicle had to get by?” Shelby asked, unaware that protesters part like water when an ambulance comes through. “I know I shouldn’t complain, but it’s just annoying, you know?”


She added: “Don’t tell anyone I said that.”


Shelby, who has COVID antibodies and a clean bill of health, has joined a couple of the marches that were going directly by her home, and then left at the end of her block – but never farther than that.



“It sucks that a lot of the protests start at like 6pm on weekdays,” she said, as thousands of BIPOC and allies are working tirelessly to push this nascent movement forward at all times of day. “I had a lot of work to do on those days. Sorry, but it was loud. Ugh!”


As one of the biggest revolutionary movements are happening before her very eyes, Shelby wishes the helicopters above her apartment could also tone it down just a bit.