Unwanted Opinion: I Don’t NEED Nail Polish

If I hear one more girl walking down the street saying that her life is fulfilled by her choice of nail polish, I am going to scream.


Didn’t like hearing that, ladies? Just wait until you read the rest of my total assault on popular public opinion.


You may have your own fully formed opinion about nail polish, but you need to stop believing it and read what I have to say because I am a minority opinion. For years, society has forced me into believing I need nail polish in my life, but I’m telling society to collectively fuck themselves.


I can’t even tell you how many people have criticized and threatened me in my day-to-day life because of my outspoken views, threatening to break into my home and paint my nails themselves. I’m not afraid of these threats.


Nobody is going to tell me what to do with my body, and my nails are part of my body. Every nail polish ad I see is an assault on my body. And for all those people trying to get me to paint my nails – you’re literally RAPING MY BODY. Wearing nail polish is basically saying you support rape. What is wrong with you??


Can’t handle me telling it like it is? Good. Most people can’t handle me telling it like it is, and that’s why I was hired to write for this site.



I’m not rich or beautiful or skinny or well connected or liked by most people. I’m just a woman who is forced to live in a world with unfair standards, so I suggest you check your privilege. Are you checking it? If you don’t feel like total shit right now, you aren’t checking hard enough, so keep checking.


Speaking of trauma, even the idea of nail polish adds traumatic experiences to my everyday life. Wearing those degrading foam toe separators for hours? Being forced to listen to people telling me I need to “take care of my nails” and my cuticles are “damaged” and I should probably “see a doctor about the discoloration of my hands?” I AM NOT DAMAGED! I AM BEAUTIFUL JUST THE WAY I AM!


I mean, if you do use nail polish and you’re still happy with your life, that’s fine I guess. I’m just too busy taking care of myself – my dog and my Pinterest board are the real priorities in my life. I just choose to have a life instead of spending every waking moment thinking about covering my nails in a stupid colored lacquer all the time.


What do you think about nail polish? Sound off in the comments cause I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU SAY SO SHUT UP.